Morning Ray of Sunshine

Life is a roller coaster. There are always going to be ups and downs, things are not going to go as planned, there will be setbacks, upsets, challenges, people will disappoint us, hurt us, cheat us, endless minor irritants will keep showing up… so on and so forth.

We have two choices – one to let all these affect us, pull us down, make us sad, angry, angsty, stressed, tense… Or we can take it in our stride, smile and focus on the good things in our life, everything that’s going our way, smile and make the most of all of that.

Fact is no matter which one we choose, we’re still going to get the same number of days to live that we’re meant to, all that we’re meant to receive we will get (of course provided we work for it), what we’re not meant to we won’t  (no matter how much we angst or rail).

So then let’s just think about a thing – at the end of this journey would we rather look back on a life full of happiness and laughter and loving and living and making the most of every moment or a life full of tears and sadness and anger and tension and frustration.

No contest, folks. Let’s celebrate the life we have


Morning Ray of Sunshine

In everything we do in life there’s a tendency to want to take the easy way out – to opt for an easier workout, or give up in the last ten seconds of that killing exercise, not do that last rewrite revision saying it’s good enough, not addressing the inherent problems in a relationship and saying it’s just a phase, it’ll work itself out on its own, distancing oneself from a person hoping they’ll get a hint and avoiding that frank chat, saying sorry on mail or sms instead of just calling or meeting – the list is endless.

Sure it’s easier in the short term, we don’t have to face our fears, we don’t have to look at what’s not working in our lives or our own shortcomings. We can live in the delusion of it’s all fine, it’ll all be fine.

Whom are we fooling – only ourselves. Things don’t get fine, they get worse and end badly. One could have parted ways amicably and stayed friends, instead it ends in bitterness and acrimony. Instead of a little pain in exercise, one opts for a lot more agony in ailment, restrictions, medical fees et al.

We know the truth even though we don’t choose to see it.

And even if the worst doesn’t happen, the best doesn’t either.  Our work remains good enough, doesn’t become great, exceptional. Cause we’re running from fears and difficult situations we don’t become stronger, we don’t grow. We don’t fix the weak links in our life. We don’t allow ourselves to become awesome.

It’s a simple choice. Are we ok with ok ok, chalta hai… or do we need to stretch ourselves, be the best we could be, do the best we could, have the most amazing life imaginable…

Why would we choose anything less for ourselves?

Morning Ray of Sunshine

Clarity. We usually understand this word as knowing what to do, what we don’t want to do, what we want from life, what we don’t want, who we really are, who we pretend to be etc. And it is all that.

But there is another powerful aspect of clarity which is when faced with a situation knowing what it is it that we have control over, what all can we do,  and more importantly what all we have no say in – especially the outcome.

Now it’s important to use the clarity so that we can do all the things within our power as regards the situation, leave no stone unturned to sort it. But having done that we need to use the clarity that everything else inculding the outcome is beyond our power. So there’s no point angsting or stressing about them. Rather having done our best we just need to surrender the rest to higher powers.

Angsting will serve no purpose apart from attracting negative energies and perhaps unwanted outcomes. But peace, calm, clarity not only frees us to move on to doing other things, enjoying and making the most of the moment but also attracts good energies and creates the ambience for a positive result.

So let’s do what’s in our power, trust the rest will be taken care of and just focus on doing more, living more, loving a lot more today.

Morning Ray of Sunshine

The biggest myth in our lives is control. We keep trying to control everything – the situations in our life, the people we love, the outcomes we want… In the process we get stressed, angsty, fight with people when they don’t behave the way we want them to, rail against the world when things don’t go according to our ‘Plan’. In short we make ourselves and around us miserable.

While the truth is we don’t control jack. Except for our own attitude and reactions. And the latter is the one thing we act as if we’re not in control of…

Let’s face it… we don’t know what is in store for us and we won’t till it happens. We can choose where we want to head but not where we land up. So then why break our heads over consequences and trying to control life?

Life is about flowing not controlling. We wouldn’t try and control the waves in the sea when we’re swimming. Then why try when we’re swimming in the sea of life? Instead flow with the tide, expend less energy and enjoy the ride.

That’s all life is about – the journey. We will reach where we have to and the destinations will be far more right for us than what we scheme and struggle for. So thrn let’s just trust that and have a ball on the way there. Let’s enjoy whatever comes, let’s make the most of the time we spend with whoever is in our life, let us be content, grateful and excited with whatever life has served up on our plate rather than trying to figure what’s on others’ tables or what else is in the kitchen.

It’s a wonderful life long as we choose to believe it, go with that attitude and make the most of whatever comes. Life is in the living not the planning or moaning.

Live it up. Now…

Morning Ray of Sunshine

Loving someone and holding onto them are not the same. In fact almost the opposite.

Love in its truth is unconditional, doesn’t come with diktats like love me back with equal fervour, stay with me etc. In the name of love we sometimes try to hold on too tight, suffocating the other, forcing them to run from us, the exact opposite of what we wanted.

Let’s love people with genuine delight and passion, openness and surrender but most of all the unquestioning faith that love will come to us, perhaps from this person, perhaps from someone else but we are not alone, never. Most of all we cannot let ourselves become needy for we must love ourselves fully before we can even begin to really love anyone else. Otherwise it isn’t love, just a contract – I will fulfil your ‘love’ needs, you fulfil mine…

If we have chosen to love someone let it be the real thing. Let it be pure, unconditional and liberating. Let us not hold on to them or look for artificial ways of timing them to us. If they love us, it will reach us from wherever they are. And if not, there is still love in our lives, we just have to open ourselves to it.

But first let’s learn to give love, to ourselves and others, unconditionally and just bathe and revel in the sheer joy of selfless love. Magic will follow.

Morning Ray of Sunshine

Life is fickle. We may be fit and fine and thinking we have another four to five decades and then BANG! Over…

Of course that doesn’t mean we start worrying or panicking. Exactly the opposite. We start living. 200 percent. NOW.

All those dreams we have – things we want to accomplish, adventures we want to go on, experiences we want to try – the whole bucket list – no waiting till we’re 60, 70 to take a look – let’s start doing them now – all of them. None of those time, money, other responsibilities excuses – if we set our mind we know we can find a way. And fact is if we had just 6 more months, we would find a way. So let’s just go for it.

And ditto on anyone we care for, if there’s something beautiful we want to say, something special we want to do, well right now is the time to do it. In fact even if we didn’t have it on our agenda let’s just go ahead and do beautiful, loving, special things for everyone we care about.

And then what? We can also make another bucket list no? Think of more wonderful things to do for those we love. If we end up doing more, living more, loving more then we planned hey that’s super awesome. More power to that

Morning Ray of Sunshine

So often in life we sit and mourn about things that we haven’t done, things we should have done a year, 3 or 5 or 10 years ago.

Well maybe we should have done them, maybe we didn’t really want to and hence didn’t and our mind is just messing with us. Either way fact is we didn’t do them and we can’t change that today.

But what about today? What about now? There are so many things we want to do right now. Why on earth would we waste the precious moments wherein we could be doing these things on bemoaning what is gone and cannot be undone? If we’re really feeling bad about having been lazy or cowardly in the past, let’s change that in this moment. Let’s leap in and do an awesome job on everything we have on our plate just now.

Fact is what is gone but our life is not. As long as we are alive everything we dream of or want to accomplish is possible right now, right here be it excellence in what we do, or giving and receiving love or helping people or whatever.

So let’s not waste time thinking or talking, let’s just do. Seize the day. Seize the dream

Morning Ray of Sunshine

You know how we have this tendency of constantly second guessing ourselves. We do a job and then keep wondering – have we done it right, can it be better, should I have done something differently. Job is done, purpose served, people are appreciating it but we’re still beset by doubts and we cover up our insecurity and lack of faith in ourselves by calling it perfectionism. What it is fear and lack of self belief.

We do the same with decisions – dither forever or make one and then keep questioning, wondering, angsting if we’ve made the wrong call, try and reverse things and then doubt that as well.

Consequence – we’re stuck, don’t move forward, lose out on opportunities, on living the moment.

Let’s just look at ourselves in the mirror and accept that we are phenomenal, special, unique, gifted individuals. Let us appreciate how talented and awesome we are and then let’s make a commitment to ourselves, not to doubt our work, our decisions. But to surrender to our hearts and the guidance from above and trust that we are where we should be, doing what we should be, heading where we should.

And ultimately there is no right decision, wrong decision, everything only helps us learn, grow and moves us to where we’re meant to go. Ditto with all the work. Let’s chuck aside the ego of being right or perfect, accept we are lifelong students and with innocence, enthusiasm and excitement, let’s enjoy exploring, experimenting, discovering and growing. After all every failure gives us a new opportunity to try something new, to become even better.

Let’s embrace that and just have fun. Like we used to when we were kids and never cared about being right.

Morning Ray of Sunshine

There are people who matter a lot to us, whom we really like, love even but somewhere in the daily routine and balancing act we’ve kind of not been keeping in touch with them. Maybe it’s been months since we met them or spoke to them.

But even thinking about them makes us happy, brings a smile to our face, fills our heart with love.

Then why wait, let’s grab today to reach out to those people, tell them how much they mean to us, tell them a simple but beautiful ‘I love you’.

And let’s just push ourselves just that little bit to go meet them. So that we can go give them that panda hug we’ve been saving up for them…

Anyone we love, everyone we love, let’s tell them. Let’s spread the love.

Morning Ray of Sunshine

Coming closer and closer to Christmas and a bold, brilliant, spectacular new year. Time to keep ourselves happier and even happier.

So to start with let’s drop all our worries. Be it the big ones that seem so life threatening to us or the niggling little ones – am I going to get caught in traffic today kinds.

Let’s look at each one, accept that they are preying on our mind, understand what is the fear that scares us. And then let’s imagine the worst, that horrible outcome that scares us so much, let’s see ourselves facing it, if the heart starts thumping faster, if we feel low – let that happen. But then let’s breathe, calm ourselves down and SMILE. And then let’s see ourselves with calmness and strength, handling the situation, coming out on top, bouncing back and living our life.

Let’s take a mental photograph of ourselves smiling and walking away from that outcome like a chanpion. And if every the worry returns – which it will – we just think about that photo, feel that exultation and triumph in our hearts and laugh the worry away.

In fact whatever situation, whatever not nice thing comes up henceforth, let’s just train ourselves to laugh at it and see ourselves on top.

Cause we can. We are powerful souls. We will triumph.