This morning I remembered an old song we learned in school – Count Your Blessings. What a powerful message that is.
We’re acutely aware of what we don’t have, what’s not happening in our life, what’s not working. But suppose we turned the camera the other way – looked at what all is awesome in our life, what are the blessings we’ve got, what all we’ve achieved, what is fantastic about the people in our life, what is fantastic about ourselves and just felt happy and grateful and contented.
That itself would fill our hearts with so much goodness and positivity which would in turn attract so much more awesomeness in our lives. Worth a try no?
Always good to just stop, see how far we’ve come, see how blessed we are, say Thanks, give ourselves a pat on the back and just feel happy about ourselves, about life.
Generosity – some of us tend to understand this word in a purely material sense. And while being generous with money is good, there are other areas where it is as important to be large hearted.
Consider a parent. Were he to lavish money and luxuries on his child but hold back on love, attention and time, would we consider him a good parent? Same logic applies to us. Are we being generous with our love, attention and time? If not let’s start.
Amongst our closest people who are those who deserve more time and uninterrupted attention from us? Who could do with hugs, kisses, expressions of love, being made to feel special? Whom haven’t we been there for? Who has been dying to meet us but we’ve been too busy?
Let’s make our lists and just open our hearts and envelop these people in our love. The beautiful thing about being generous with love is that for it to go out, it must course through us. So the first heart we light up with love and warmth is our own.
When we say goals we most often think of something huge, life-changing, something that we can strive for over a 1/5/10 year period. Nothing wrong with that – we need those. But we also need short term goals.
And by short term one means daily targets. Something that gives us a sense of achievement, something that we can get excited and charged up about, that gets our adrenaline pumping, that we can look forward to, that can gives meaning and purpose to the day.
Let’s face it, every day will have its share of routine and drudgery and things we hate. But when we have this one target, one goal to achieve, it gives us the energy and enthusiasm to breeze past all those other not so nice stuff.
So getting that one chapter written or making that proposal or reaching out to those 5 people you want to pitch to… whatever we need, let’s chart it and set sail.
And why only work goals – we could throw in personal goals be it doing something nice for some special or scheduling a fun evening with friends or taking in some art or music or culture or just a cycle ride or swim.
Every day is precious. Let’s make sure we make ours special and memorable and oodles of fun
We all probably have stuff that we’ve been avoiding, procrastinating for ever. Whatever be the reason, fear blah blah, fact is these are things that need to be done and till we do them we’re blocking some goodness coming our way, some chance to soar ahead and grow.
So starting today let’s begin finishing this stuff off – one by one, step by step. And let’s not make it a labour of Hercules or sheer drudgery by hating every moment of it, groaning, moaning.
Let’s bring in innocence and enthusiasm, let’s find some way to make a game out of it… or add some fun to the doing of this task – be it music or candy treats or whatever.
We’re on the verge of something big. So let’s clean up our trash and make space for it.
There are always going to be people who tell us what we’re doing is wrong. There are always people with suggestions on how we can do things better, live our life better. Only question is whose life is it, whose dream is it? So then who decides what’s best?
Which doesn’t mean we turn a deaf ear to these folks or send them off with an earfull. Nope. They mean well, care for us, so let’s give them a proper hearing, with an open heart and no ego, let’s understand what their point is. And be grateful for their good intentions and love.
But then let’s come back to our hearts. And let the heart decide how best to do things. For no one knows better, not those who love us the most, definitely not our minds and egos. The heart is from where the Universe talks to us, guides us.
So let’s just follow our hearts. And live our lives, our way. Nobody can do it better.
We have been hearing endless debates on freedom of speech, intolerance over the last few weeks. The only thing that seems to emerge from every debate is the lack of tolerance shown by every single person to everyone else’s freedom to have an opinion.
So instead of contributing to the fire, how about in our lives – we all start showing some tolerance. Let’s pick on the one person whose point of view or opinions or whose every single spoken word we detest, argue with scream at. Could be our mom or dad, our spouse, boss, colleague, neighbour. Anyone we dismiss as irritating or painful.
And let’s at least for today listen to them, really listen. One is not saying agree or pretend to agree but just for today without any of the biases or baggage that we usually have listen and try and understand why they’re saying, where they’re coming from. The object being, not to understand the logic of what they’re saying but understanding them as people. It needn’t be about something profound or political – even just the usual refrain to clean our room or not leave the bathroom so wet – you get the drift.
And when we’re done listening and understanding, if it comes from our heart let’s at least give them a smile. If we feel like, maybe a hug. In whatever way that is real, let’s leave them with the feeling that we have heard them, we do love them.
Methinks in today’s world, a little love, a little understanding, a bit of unbiased listening can go a long, long way
You know what’s the biggest obstacle stopping us from fulfilling our dreams, having awesome relationships, getting fit, exploring the world, learning everything we want… pretty much stopping us from living our life fully? LAZINESS.
Don’t feel like going for a walk today, I’ll make that call tomorrow, I’ll write when I feel inspired, this month is busy – maybe next, I’ll take her out over the weekend, weekdays commute too hard… the list is endless. But can we honestly say that even one of these excuses is anything more than that – a sad way to avoid getting off our butts and living our lives?
Sure fear is a factor in not doing some of these things. Fear of failure, of rejection but if we were to accept that there is fear, we could face it and forge forward regardless. But since we garb fear in the form of laziness, we avoid doing what we’re scared of, without even admitting that there is fear.
So starting now, whenever we begin on whatever we’ve wanted to do and laziness crops up, let’s smile, put an arm around him, take him aside and then holding his hand (or neck), let’s dive right into doing we wanted to do. Same for fear.
Life’s too short for procrastination. Anything we want to do, we better do now
It is so easy to get carried away when things are going well. Also when things are completely screwed up. But getting carried away in either circumstance is fully self destructive and utterly pointless.
When things are going great it’s good to enjoy it but without letting one’s ego soar to the skies or feeling that this is all our own doing and we are the cat’s whiskers who can do no wrong. Far better to feel proud of ourselves yes but also grateful to the Higher Powers for their blessings and to everyone around us, who have definitely contributed to our happiness. Most of all let’s not get attached or dependent on things going our way. We don’t have to get anxious or cynical but a level of detachment is great where we can enjoy the good times without coming crashing if and when they end.
And if and when we do go through a bad patch, while feeling angry or sad is justified, making oneself a victim or martyr, completely collapsing, seeking solace in misery, self pity or substance abuse – all totally not needed. Makes way more sense to accept what’s happening with equanimity, go through the feeling sad phase. And then with the confidence that good times will come and the gumption to make that happen, let’s get up and start doing whatever one needs to do, way harder than ever before.
Life is a rollercoaster – so we may as well switch back to our kid selves and allow ourselves to be thrilled and gratified whether the ride goes up and down. Giddy, pukey, exhilarated – whatever, just have a blast
There is a C Word we need to drop and a C word we need to embrace.
Comparison. Wow – he’s so lucky, his job is so much more fun than mine, his wife is so much hotter than mine, her dress is better than mine, his kids are smarter than mine, he/she is better than me – Alright stop it already!!!
Instead how about Contentment. How about for a change, today focussing on the blessings in our life – all the awesome things about our parents, our better halves, our siblings, our friends, bosses, colleagues, kids, jobs, houses – everything that is part of our lives. And most important let’s focus on what is fantastic about ourselves.
Today no running ourselves down or anybody or anything that makes up our beautiful life. No complaining, whining, fault finding. Instead let’s just be happy and grateful for each one of them, thank the Higher Powers for showering us with these precious gifts and let’s just celebrate all that we have.
Let’s make it My Life is Good day or even My Life is Great. Cause it is
There’s nothing wrong with being a good person. The trouble comes when we try and live up to our image of what a good person is, all the time.
First of all it’s not natural, we’re just playing a part. Second of all we’re repressing some very natural emotions be it anger or sadness or anything else that we have defined as not good. Which means these are getting bottled up and will explode sooner or later. Third of all we’re letting go of who we really are – and that real self is more precious and more beautiful than any manufactured ‘good’ persona we may don.
So from today let’s not fake it, let’s not pretend. If something upsets us let’s be frank about it. We don’t need to throw temper tantrums but we do need to express what we’re honestly feeling, be it rage or frustration or disappointment or sadness. And screw what anyone thinks.
Even the feelings we label super bad like lust or jealousy or greed or vanity – if we feel it, let’s accept it, express it in a balanced way and allow us ourselves to just be who we really are…
It’s a huge step towards loving and accepting ourselves and also freeing ourselves of unwanted baggage. And let’s trust that the people who really matter love us just the way we are